I'm Pink as of today

In a few hours time I am about to turn pink!

Yes ladies and germs... I'm getting back my pink IC and some might ask what the heck am I doing on the computer and online at this time?

For those of you thinking it's all about porn....... You'll never know will you ?

But thats not the issue.... I'm actually doing my LAST bit of sh-*t for the ARMY........

Check it out....


The army TOTALLY stifles your creativity doesn't it....
But oh well.. if thats what they want, give it to em... I'm leaving anyway.....

"In the real world, do what your customer wants, not what YOU want"

Goodnight

A Tragic end to a brilliant saga

I'm not going to elaborate much cuz I'm tired.

But completely twist the original story and your fans would be disappointed.

X-MEN have come to an end.

Hair dresser............ He SUCKS!

I just cut my hair......And now i regret it.......

All RSM's fault.... Keep TRYING to force me to cut and then I got irritated with my own hair in the end........ Now it's WORSE.

I told the man.

Trim the sides, tidy the top and back and leave my fringe long.

End up he cuts my top REALLY short, and trims my sides so much that he sneakily cut of both edges of my fringe. And when he realises what a buffoon he's been and that he had cut a hole on the side of my fringe, he asked,

"Err you said you didn't want to cut your fringe right?"

(And I was like thinking yeah you f*cking cut a hole on both sides liao now leave the centre of my fringe so long for what.)

After saying that he simply left the rest of my fringe there and now I look like a doofus with an obvious hair disaster unless I put wax or gel to cover up.

Nothing's going right for me these days...... sobs.

Dependancy

I was talking to Good ole KUZ beatrice a couple of days ago and we came upon this issue on dependency.

She was telling me that Gab questioned her on whether or not she had such issues and she realised how true it was.

And since we got to that topic, I started to wonder about myself.

Everytime I have an early leave from work, the first thing I'd do is call a friend to ask if he or she is free to spend some time together. The unfortunate thing is that MOST or rather ALL of my friends who have seen me through the times now have found their own paths and no one seems to be there anymore.

I still remember the days when I could just give a ring to good old pals like Ben and he'd come running down to meet me regardless of time and day. That happened vice versa of course. But now everyone seems to be so busy all the time.

Last Saturday was terrible. I spent the WHOLE day at home not because I wanted to. But because no one wanted to go out with me. Ben was with if GF and he said he'd call me back (which he did at like 11pm...so much for that) Rach had her stuff, Beatrice had her stuff.... and I didn't really know who I can ask out and what to do on such short notice. NO ONE is willing to just sit at a kopi tiam (where it's cheap) and simply stone and spend some quality time with each other anymore.

No wonder everyone is out looking for a spouse. When you have a girl or boy friend, he or she is dedicated to you. It is a must to meet up every once in awhile (for ppl like ben it's slightly more though) and almost mandatory that a simple gesture of an sms or a phone call is to be made everyday!

Hey! I like attention and that fact has been known to myself for a really long time! Nevertheless fear of failure has led me to a state whereby I create barriers between myself and others. I simply lost the ability and courage to open my mouth and tell people whom I have special feelings for what I really feel. So much so that I start to ignore, shun and eventually drift away from them.

No wonder I could never bring myself to "jioing" ppl I've known for ages. If you go after someone new, there's nothing to lose! You havent even gotten to know him/her (err only hers for my case) well enough to lose whatever ties you have forged! And goodey two shoes me also cannot bring myself to having one night stands or taking advantage of women and flirting irresponsibily. In that sense, I even fail as a "Swinging Bachelor!"

Some people..... In fact, many have told me, "Hey JeRmS, I'm sure you have the ability to get practically any girl you wanted. You're nice, sweet, and funny! Plus you don't look half bad!"
Thanks guys but sometimes it's all about my own mental. I've come to realise that I'm all talk and no action. I know what's to be done and many times I even give some good advice! (Come on... you know its true) But somehow I just can't walk the walk.

Then again.... The issue here is NOT about having a spouse, but about dependancy. Companionship is more important than anything else!(Ok..... that kinda sounds towards the road of gay'dom but whatever..) That's what I thought when I boldly claimed that I have seen the light on love and relationships. So what do you do when every buddy and pal that braved the stormy weathers with you leave after finding their own compainions? Emptiness is what remains. No one but god can stay beside you all the way. But how long can you last with something/one that is based only on firm belief? Not that I do not I am only human. And humans are weak.

Well I'm already 20 years young and in 2 months time I'd be 21..... The clock is ticking. 5 years ago I'd say time will tell.... Can I still say the same 5 years from now?

Gawd...... I suck..... Haha someone smack some of the confidence I used to have in me and I'd treat you to ice cream........ Fail and I'd smack you back! haha.

LOVE

What is love?

The Bible says, "GOD is Love"

Father spoke at a sermon today, "If you cannot forgive someone, then you are not truely loving."

Can there truely be real love between two people?

Love your friends because you want to.
Love your enemies because of GOD.

CONTROVERSY

Alrights......
Today is the day I shall talk about beloved RACHEL....... (Special request.. Plus I didn't go out so there's nothing to talk about)

Well well...My buddy and pal for some 6-7 years eh? And all you can do is go out with boyfriend and looking for me each and everytime you have a problem. Lol.

Ok maybe you ain't half as bad as the intro haha I'm just being mean. (But touch your heart babe)

Hee.. Well since I'm on the topic of you, I'd might as well go all out and put up some picture! Starting with the birth of the evil twin of mine herslef! haha.

"Momma always needed a new mop for the floor"

MANY would probably scream at the sight of these pics but....... I DON'T CARE..........
so ya. ( Rachel.... controversy should have been spelt as RACHEL in the first place)

1st up would actually be the SFX choir (where we first met)... Dumb place with a world of scandals. Haha. One of which should never be told to the world again! For those who know shuddap!... hee... But for those who don't, I'm gonna tickle ya balz by saying it's got something to do with LLLLL!


Never the less.. Rachel has always been there.

"secondary days were a blast!'

All though our secondary years I must say life would have been alot more dull without ya

Next up would be on my EX darling(End of sec days-early JC)..... Haha... (Sorry but I was too tempted and had to bring it up.)

"Surgically seperated, We are"

She'd Probably be pissed that I put up this pick but ya. Like I said.. I don't care...
You had to introduce this person to me didn't you. Haha. Well I cannot say that I regretted it but I think she'd beg to differ so ya.

Then there were the years when the two of us were simply to retarded and bored... (end of jc years)

Come to think of it I really DID comply to most of ya silly requests.... Even this!!!
(The next pic DID stun ppl hence removed... haha)

I vaguely remember that the 2 of us had our own better halves when this was taken....
Well If I can agree to wear my sec sch Uniform 3 Years after I left...
I'd probably do anything...

Last but not least..... Now you are in UNI 2nd year and I'm about to enter the same uni and hostel as you!!!!...... Cannot imagine whats going to happen next..

"Momma freaked out when she discovered there were two of us"

Oh well.. I Guess everyone's just gotta stay tuned to find out!

TGIF

Thank God It's Friday..........

Lets run through the day.

Met with my "TALL" brudder daoshu to watch davinci code...... and it was one hell of a convincing 'Mind F*ck". Nevertheless full of lies and half truths to make an interesting story.
Great for a movie but TERRIBLE for its implications. What if someone actually took this Sh*t for real?!!!!!

DAN Brown.... (I hope I don't get sue'd for this but) If there was an anti christ. You'd be IT.



Next I went to work.... YES!! last day of the week.
Well Corianderleaf is open on Sats too but somehow Dom has been kind to me and seldom puts me up to work. (Considering she pushes me every other day of the week!)

Today was bad.. Real Bad. It's one of those "I worked every day at home on my design stuff and every night reaching home in the wee hours of night" thing. Your body is stressed and your zest for life has been robbed off you. (Not cuz I watched that mind f movie)

My eyes were listless... And I had no motivation to even move my legs.

Things didn't help when I kept getting scolded for conflicting instructions.

XX: "Don't care about that. You go Go do this and do it this way"

YY: "Why you doing this, and this way!!!? It's wrong"

ZZ: "How come you not there doing the work when everyone is busy?" (Cuz I was BUSY doing what XX told me to do in the first place!")

So if all of them ARE my managers who do I follow?

Nevertheless... The place is great and the people are good. Check out the webpage if you have the time

haha....... Well the worst is over and I can chill out over the weekend.... Oh sh*t..... I am supposed to have a recall this SAT... So much for my chilling out. Oh well.



Hee well I did run off earlier today and we popped by PITSTOP cafe once again.. haha.
Seems to be a hot fav in terms of hangouts for the guys these days... Well good for Tim( The Co-owner) anyway.

Oh and we played this really fun game.... starts with C.. haha some card game forgot the name suddenly but its a building your territory and 'sabo'ing' people thing... Really balanced and funfilled with strategies.

Last but not least..... Yes Rachel I'll Blog you one day..... but I think I wrote too long an entry already haha... Tomorrow se how ba.

P.S. If anyone bothers to read this blog or notice anything, I've put the links of both Cor.leaf and pitstop! Hey! This is free advertising man! I should get paid for this!.

Sentimental fool.

I suddenly remembered one of my first blog addies and decided to check it out and wham! A world of fond mempries kicked in. (I'm such a sentimental psycho.)

Despite how much I say I'm open minded, I still feel that I'm nothing but an old fool when it comes to throwing away any of my old stuff till tossing away memories from the past and tracing the steps that I walked with people and stuff. HENCE! Sentimental psycho me decided to add in the links to my old webshots ripped off from my old blog! lol...

A trip down memory lane for some of ma old pals and somehing worth checkin' out for anyone who just got to know me.

Enjoy.

Talk about OLD photos...

Life as a Soldier.... The SAF experience.

I really hate to talk about it, I'd really hate to blog about it. But today really justs screams out a big F U to the SAF...

Once again I was rudely awakened at 730 in the morning. Didn't help that I slept at 3 odd am in the morning and consdering how much I tossed and turned I probably slept at 4.
Stoned on my bed for a good half an hour before finally deciding it was time to go to the "COMPULSORY" breifing in camp.(which was supposed to be at 830)

I finally picked up my bike and cycled a grueling 13KM up and down the slopes of Yo Chu Kang just to arrive in the auditorium 15mins late and see the words "End of slide. The End"

What the heck... half of my department didn't even bother to come and they didn't seem to care (so much for COMPULSORY). Oh well. I was in camp for a different reason anyway. My good ole "God pa" from camp asked me to come back to do him a favour. (Some design nonsense...as usual... feeding off free stuff and services)

Our beautiful meeting after such a long time was almost instantly shattered from the moment we met.

Jerms: "Yo Sir! How've you been? So what do you want me to do for you?"

RSM: Eh your hair f*cking long leh.

Jerms: Hur? Sir I ORD in 2 weeks and I don't even have to come back leh. Today I came all the way back to do you a favour leh.

RSM: Do you know you are still under the SAF and you are recallable at anytime? Eh you go cut your hair now.

Jerms:...

RSM: Aiyah I don't wanna talk to you.. You go home cut your hair.

(Siala... is that how you ask a favour? You think I "very" wanted to come all the way to camp to do you a free service ah)

Jerms: So you want to tell me what you want to do or not. If not I really go home already.

Yahdah yahdah......
The tension was really high but in the end " God pa " always had a soft side for me.

Still I really took offence to the whole idea of I'm not supposed to be in camp in the first place. Here I am doing him a favour and there he is picking on the siliest of issues to someone whom is almost a civilian!


Retarded.

---------------------------- =) --------------------


My friends and I used to joke alot about army lingo and how 2.5 (now less than 2 even for the new enhanced batch) years of brain washing would definitely drive you nuts.

Eg.

1) A man wakes up in the morning and feels totally like sh*t. He rings up the office......
What is the first thing he'd say?

" Eh pai seh... I'm sick. Going to Attend C (military medical status that allows you to stay at home, much like an M.C.) today"

2) This is pointing out to all those who have served their time in the SAF before. Don't you realise that everytime you are refering to a room or quarters for living you'd most DEFINITELY use the words....

" So you going to your bunk later is it?"

3) This incident also happened to me quite awhile back but I might as well mention it.

Jerms: Can I have more chilli and ketchup please?
BK waitress : How many more?

"MANY MANY MORE" (hahaha that has a familiar ring to it doesn't it?)

---------------------------------- =) ------------------------

To top it off, here's a short and simple SMS exchange that I had with everyone's favourite manager, at the restaurant that I work in, just moments before I went to work today.

XXX (Id protection): Please get your own dinner before you come. Dinner finish.

Jerms: ok Hey thanks for the info!

XXX: I am a platoon sergeant and a GPMG (general purpose machine gun for those who don't know) Commander.

Jerms: &^$^*%$&*$^*&^% (WTF???!!!!)

(Talk about brainwashed!)
Someone please explain to me why didn't he decide to sign on into the army?

The whole irony of my SAF experience is that despite how badly it bit me and chewed me up, it gave me the chance to enter NTU Art Design and Media! (It's a long story)

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz I'm sleepy. Oh well next stop, ARSENAL V.S BARCELONA in half an hour's time!

The ARMY... Something worth experiencing.... But never repeating EVER again.

Bananas!

This happened like last Sunday but I simply HAD to talk about it.

It's mother's day and all and the guys asked me out for some BBall so I woke up at the unusually early timing of 930am. I walked out of my room, down the stairs and saw my parents having breakfast. That day it was toast. Kinda rare actually since my mum normally buys' breakfast but I guess she got sick of the kids waking up just in time for lunch and running out of the house to meet someone for it.

"Mornin!", I said.

Still half asleep I walked into the kitchen to get a cup of water. It was then.... Yes then... that I heard the most interesting arguement this year!

MUM: XXX SIEW XXX XXX ( This is to protect ma dad's id but my pals probably know my his full name anyway)!!! OMIGOD.... The person who left the BANANAS on top of the toaster to toast his bread MUST have no BRAINS.

DAD: The person who PUT the BANANAS on the toaster to start with has EVEN LESS brains! (How do you get less then none? hmmm anyway...)

MUM:What do you mean by that?! You see the BANANAS on top of the oven toaster dunno how to take them off ah? Why is your mind so one tracked....... Such a typical engineer.

DAD: If it was me I wouldn't have put the BANANAS on top of the oven in the first place! That's how I'm trained! I PREVENT accidents NOT SOLVE them!

MUM: (standing beside me..... Looks at me and shrugs)

JeRmS: Doesn't he realise how much of a peabrain he sounds like right now? Err.... Nevermind... I didn't say that.

So much for happy mothers day... I kept getting tempted to cut in and give my wise arse remarks but me and ma old man aint got the best of history together so I simply left the house for my ball game. I promptly told em the story and laughed my arse off.... In the end I was cursed with an excrutiating stomach pain that lasted half a day.

At the end of it all... the only comment I heard from my so called pals was...

"So Did you eat the BANANAS?"

Retribution

It suddenly happened

I just woke up.... I kinda feel like shit. (Stupid phone call...)

Every morning I wake up and feel pukish.
Something's probably wrong with me.
Oh well...

Today feels a li'l worse than normal.
Must be cuz of my dream.

It was her. (Stupid dream..)

I wandered around aimlessly under a block of flats for ages with a plastic bag of fries and coke from KFC.(Don't ask why... I was probably hungry)
Finally I headed upstairs. I hesistated when I was at the door but somehow I knew that I wanted to get in. I wanted to call her just to see if she was around but I couldn't... Or rather... I wouldn't. Simply because I knew she would not pick up the phone.

My heart raced. "What the heck", I told myself. "I'm already at her door step." I rang the bell and to my surprise there was a young indian girl, probably 15-18years of age who opened it.

"Where is 'she'?" I asked.

She disappeared for a while came back with "her". I didn't know how to react (as always). There were so many things that I wanted to ask her and tell her that I did not know where to begin. My mind was filled with so many why's and how come's that I almost broke down in tears.

She looked fine. Fabulous even. Yet different. Something in her was missing... her innoncence.

"Where have you been?", I asked. "You refuse to pick up my calls and you never reply my SMS's. Why must it be that I have to come down personally to your house before I can talk to you?"

All she could do was laugh. A cheecky one at that. Still just as careless and irresponsible as from the first day we met. She didn't even bother to reply. Or rather, her replies were always so vague that she'd might as well shut up. It was tormentuos just to even talk to her yet something in me told me that I wanted to.

I followed her down the stairs and she met up with a guy. Somehow I couldn't figure out who he was. At first I thought he was "M" but later she recieved a phone call in which I simply knew it was "M" on the line. The 3 of us walked on. All the time I was trying to get her attention. All the questions that I wanted to ask were simply rejected by nonchalent glances as she continues to talk on the phone.

Finally we sat down. It wasn't the best of places, (a hawkercentre) but at least she was off the phone. By hook or by crook I needed to get answers. What did I do that pissed her off so much. Why can't she be a li'll nicer to me. Have I failed so much as a human being that I'm totally unable to maintain a friendship with someone whom I USED to share a thing called love? Or did I hurt her so bad that even the sight of my number on her phone would make her turn in disgust.

I walked out to take a look at the food and with every step that I took, I knew that I was getting closer to my answers. Just as I was heading back, my FUC*ING telephone rings. (I wake up... stupid "pak kee")

I'm pissed... Shut up... Don't talk to me.
Like I said... What a shitty dream.

My Last Try

This seems like my millionth attempt at blogging... but then again I'm starting school soon (YES I FINALLY got into NTU ADM(art design and media) and this'll probably be the best place to post up what ever works I've got.

Nevertheless... If I forget my Blog addy and password etc... this'll probably be the 1st and last entry..(again)

I did intend to spam random thought's when creating this blog but then again.. It's late and I'd probably spam tomorrow..... (and find a nicer skin)

Procrastination.

Why start something when you don't intend to finish it? Well..... We'll only know tomorrow.